How can I be a better Gifter?

[colorlessmonster]

It doesn't matter how well I try, I always seem to upset someone with gifts. With how many friends this game requires you to have for goals, I have such a hard time following each individual. (i do think there is an underlying problem here... but that's another discussion)

You get to send neighbors 2 gifts a day.
The first comes from any requests you respond to
the second comes from any "Mass gift" you can deliver to neighbors


I get plenty of gifts each day like right now i keep getting the event aprons and i don't really want them, which is okay I just decline them. But it seems to always be a problem for others. If I really need a gift i'll go to each persons wall and personally request it because before i send out my "Mass gift" I check my wall and respond appropriately, If i missed anyone the previous day I'll send them what they asked for yesterday and hope it helps.

How do you guys best please your neighbors? Today I asked for a screw cause I accidentally put down two to-build appliances and wanted one gone. A neighbor of mine was peeved and sent back a cali screw and informed me they would have preferred a mallet. I felt horrible, I did laugh when i had a message on my wall. I sent "A" Screw as requested, but a mallet sure would have helped. (I did find this hilarious, and had a chuckle, well done neighbor <3) When I went to their page I saw a wall message asking for a single mallet that was not there before i went to sleep and mass gifted.

I felt horrible and I think this particular event was unavoidable but it's the one that really helped me to step back and think I need to evaluate my gift giving,

How do you guys manage to please as many neighbors as possible? I always reply to requests, but I also want to mass gift (helpfully)

[AnnirasSweets]

This may sound callous but I really don't mean it to be... Over the years, I've found it's just easier and better in the long term to remove players from my neighbor list that have playing styles that differ vastly from my own. It may seem harsh at first, but it's really the best way that I've found to avoid undo stress and irritation in what is meant to be a relaxing hobby for me.

I have a little note on my wall that clearly states my playing style, it's something along the lines of: I mass gift parts only, goal parts during goals, basic parts otherwise, I do not visit/tip/post on walls daily but I do answer reqs frequently and quickly. On the whole, this seems to help players know that I'm not a very 'active' neighbor in most regards and it helps me to feel like I can safely assume they know what they're getting when they add me as a neighbor. It seems to be becoming more standard to do this, in the past year or so I've seen lots of players in the add me threads go this route as well where they write super specific details of what they require/expect from their neighbors. I assume these are the players who cannot decline gifts so it's completely understandable and seems the smart choice to me.

In the rare cases where a neighbor seems to need/expect more than I can give with my frequent-but-short check-ins then I remove them but am always sure to leave a polite note explaining why. Usually the note says something like: "Sorry, it seems we've got different playing styles so I removed myself from your list to free up space so you can find a better fit." I've found that players are typically understanding and don't get overly upset at this and if they do, well then it's best they're not my neighbor for more reasons than I originally thought, lol. Honestly though, I've found the large majority of players to be rational and understanding as long as I explain the reason for any neighbor culling I do. After all, we're all dealing with the same relentless goal cycles these days.

Back when I first started playing the games, goals were a random thing that maybe happened once a season/holiday so it wasn't super important what gifts you sent/received. Neighbors seemed to serve a different purpose then, more of a collection of people you wanted to chat with when you checked in. In recent years where our months are packed full of goals, what it meant to be a good neighbor seems to have also changed. Whether this is a good, bad or indifferent turn of events remains to be seen!

I think it's completely understandable for players to occasionally take a step back to evaluate what they can do to improve their own playing/enjoyment of the game. If this includes cleaning out the neighbor list to revamp it with a better fit your current state of play, then that's okay! It may not seem like it at first glance but trust me, there are so many players out there that it's all but certain that every player can find their ideal set of neighbors. :)

[pcabral03]

I agree with AnnirasSweets posted above very eloquently put 🙂👍

You gift what works for you. Because no matter how hard you try you can't please everyone.

I mass gift goal or basics and ask nbrs to just decline if they don't need. I don't post my gift preference since I mass gift to others it wouldn't be fair if I did. Decline multiple gifts a day, but I still manage to get 20 of actual gifts needed eventually. Have allot nbrs, was stressing, and hard to gift differently to everyone. For my sanity and enjoyment switched to mass gifting. The gift list is way too long to scroll through multiple times 😞

[colorlessmonster]

I thank you both.

I like to think if someone has the time to come to my wall to ask for something in particular I'll reply with that gift of choice, and if i've already mass gifted for the day i'll keep it on the wall and give them the request tomorrow.

this is in addition to the requests, After that i'll either gift part 1, 2, or the 5 day goal parts depending on my mood

You're right though, it's best mental health to remove folks who make it a point to complain about me not reading their wall.